its been awhile.....

Been awhile what? XD

Hmm, comes to think of it, the urge of getting and looking for a gf has stopped for quite sometimes.... Months I believe...

Ever since that.....

Ah HA~

Had my aha moment today...

Gorgan will get emo when he is hungry! XD XD

grrr... i am hungry... grrr... me wan eat!

failure

It is seriously tiring and disgusting to see yourself fail and fail and saying and feeling the same thing over and over again..

Of course, we all see how can something be fixed on the outside, but how many actually understand the inner structure?

Of course, we all always think of something to support/fix the problem outside, but how many actually tried to look beyond that and support what in the inside?

Human... Me... Full of weakness....

Nope, I recognize my strength as well, thank you...

So, change it to a moving forward strength yea~ ^^

Energy

Human, something just strike my head when I am trying to.. relax?? XD

Without self control, without self awareness, without self discipline...

Without considering of others well being, Without caring, without the energy to do all these I have mention...

We will be easily offended, we will lose our temper easily and will be hurting a lot of people before we can know it...

I wanted to control, I put energy to maintain the relationship, to be true when mistakes/issue arises

It is because I care. I appreciate, I love

Being an introverts, taking energy out of myself is pretty hard, but don't get me wrong, though it is tiring, I enjoy it, I wanted to do it,

treat me however you want, i will not change the fact that i want to appreciate it~ ^^

(reminder for myself)

Cloud Strife ii

"I will not fight a meaningless battle"
"I need to convince myself, I need confirmation..."

I have my thought, I have my feeling, I have my mind.

But I just can't express them in the way that I want it to be.

Hmm... Maybe its the result of closing myself for many years?

Maybe its the biology makeup?

No wonder I like Cloud so much, again, I found similarity~ Hehe.

Wonder when will I find my Tifa? Or rather, when will I find the "right" Tifa! =P

Oh well, random thought~

Cloud Strife

Cloud Strife
(the one who unsure about himself, the one who have doubted himself)

Finally realized why do I like Cloud so much~

We have quite some similarity in term of personality~

^^

L.E.A.R.N.I.N.G

Is feeling bad always good? Is putting control on someone always bad?

d.e.p.e.n.d.s.

Reasonable bad and control is good for us. Although we do not like the way it is done to us, it somehow shape us more.

Again, what is consider reasonable?

What is consider "overly done"?

Everyone have a different benchmark for them, however, I do think honestly is really what pull people together, regardless of how the situation might be at the moment.

As for myself, I prefer to get hurt and learn AND deal with it, rather than being super confident and feels happy but know nth about it.

Well, I do acknowledge there are special case~ so, again my thought! ^^

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I am seriously starting to hate public transport, AKA KTM... the delay, the super PACKED people, the super stuffy space... Gosh....

A New Post

Finally, a new post!

Gosh, how many years did I abandoned this blog?!? Oh well, let me just update a bit of my life.

Well, as most of you might know, I am currently in Year 3. Seriously, I do not know is it just me, Year 3 is like another level of education, the workload and stress has increased! At least my conscious responsibility has improved as well. =P

Chosen my Thesis topic and really hope that I could get it!

Photography - been stopping it for a few weeks now, but... I have finally decided and found what really motivates me in photography! What I wanted to shoot and stuff, so, my dear photoblog reader, I will be posting again real soon! ^^ (partially thanks to aaron~ ^^)

AND!

I have a terrible financial management... ==""" Yea, I know, Therefore, I am writing here so that you, readers can be my "witness". I want to have a better financial management...
(Gosh, no turning back....)

Yesterday I bumped into Peter Khor and guess what? He told me he found my blog! XD XD Via google!!! How scary is that.... Ohya, Sir, if you are reading this, HI! =P

Well, thats all for now ba.. chiow!

G

Realization

Realization.

Sorry it took me like forever to realize that I've been spoiling a lot of fun event just because I did not manage my own emotion properly...

Look at me...

How...

Disgusting to look like this when it's suppose to be a fun outing and sorry, but I know, and realized that it actually disturbed everyone, if not some of you who are close to me.

Thanks for worrying/feeling because of me and sorry if I made you guys felt so.

Now that I finally realized, I will make sure it'll be under control when it's needed yea~ ^^

*huggies*

Sorry... neh?

and thanks for willing to accept me even I am sometimes/most of the times a burden~ ^^

care,love,appreciate

Which is more painful?

Can't see those who you cared forever?

or

Those who you cared doesn't care for you anymore...?

I guess it pretty painful for either one huh...?

Random thought sparkled by some anime~ =P But, this is life eh...? I prayed that I will appreciate now as those whom I cared are still here with me and care for me... ^^

JsYS,PL,YW,YY
Love you guys! *hugs*