Human, as it is

After, or rather throughout my developmental psychology class, I couldn't stop wondering, asking about questions which yields no answer. Allow me to do some explanation to what leads to me wondering and asking about some of these questions.

Today class was all about how critical and crucial is early childhood development is to human that every single event that happened, either good or bad will somehow shaped us - which some of us call personality. At this period, our emotional, psychological, physical, cognitive and behavioral development are depending on how we are being treated by our caregivers (parents). Some children were unfortunate to have parents who weren't aware of it, some parents were misinformed on how to 'perfectly' raise a child, some were just ignorant, but some were fortunate to have parents who knows what to do, when to give attention to the child and knows when is too much for the children. All these factors may influence how the particular child grows into (I am in no position of blaming parents, to be fair, they do not have the 'Bible'/guideline on how to raise a healthy child). The circle then goes on, in most cases, children will normally pickup values and belief system their parents have and apply these systems in life unless during the process of growing up, they learn a different value that could 1) change his systems all together or 2) add the value into the existing systems and improvise it. So basically what I want to convey is whoever you are today, is definitely a 'product' of learning and experiences you have from the past, good or bad. It jolly well applies to other human being which is not you too.

I, then tried to recall on all the observation I have done during all these years, how people around me treat others, how people around me comment on others and how people around me discriminated other, it gave an unpleasant experience/feeling. As a psychology student, and a human being, I totally understand where this Because-you-are-acting/behaving-in-a-way-I-approve/felt comfortable-I-like-hanging-out-with-you and when-you-are-making-me-uncomfortable/weird-I-dislike-you-and-might-trigger-me-to-bully-you-verbally-or-non-verbally reaction. What I do not understand, or rather having difficulty accepting is why judge or react or to someone whom you don't find comfortable in an aversive manner? Someone might looks/sounds stupid and dumb but that doesn't mean he is less human than us, the reason why they are so might because of the experiences he has when he is growing up, might also because when he's just few month old he wasn't really being taken care properly and might be all other sort of reason to his behavior now. Doesn't he at least deserve a chance to be talked to and treated before the judgement of you-are-so-dumb/awkward- that -you-don't-deserve-my-kindness? But what if he is an A**hole, does he even deserve respect? Well, yes, I would say, I mean not to the point that he could do whatever sh*t to you, but at least tell him that you do not like what he is doing to you/others and if he continues, then just leave the situation. We can be angry at him for being unreasonable, but that isn't a reason for us to treat him badly. I am confident that if we sincerely treat everyone nicely, others will notice.

Having said that, I am fully aware that all those being mentioned are me being too simplistic on the issue. Some people might really be beyond reasonable measure that it is impossible to work with or even smile at, but let us all try to hold the judgement card and not throwing it out too early, be nice to others sincerely. Have conflict, but not hatred war.